Isle of Man

Introduction

Welcome to our Summer 2024 edition of the Wellbeing Newsletter. We are unapologetic about our opening picture. Men’s poor wellbeing cannot be ignored - it is literally killing too many in society. For this edition the Committee wanted to look at Men’s mental health but from a slightly different angle. Today we look at how you can make small changes to assist men in their mental health.

We are also pleased to include The Chartered Secretaries’ Charitable Trust and the invaluable work the trust undertakes for members. As well as this, we bring you news of an accreditation scheme for IOM organisations and a support group, ManxPACT for anyone experiencing difficulties with their mental health.

We would like to thank Marcelene for joining the committee, who has already proven herself an invaluable member.

Think before you speak

How can women help with male mental wellbeing?

The mental health challenges experienced by men are more common than reported, and there are differences in how men and women experience and exhibit symptoms.

From an early age, social conditioning encourages boys to be “strong, independent and emotionally stoic”, whilst girls are expected to be “nurturing and empathetic”.  Such conditioning can have a lasting impact on men who may choose to hide their vulnerabilities and suppress their emotions.

Breaking down these stereotypes creates a supportive environment to address men’s mental health needs without fear, stigma, or judgment.  It is important that we, as women, provide safe spaces for men to discuss their feelings and share their experiences openly.

Women and girls are more likely to talk about our feelings, and this is often an important connection we share with our circle of friends.  Daughters, sisters, mothers, wives, partners and friends can all take the lead on this matter and help change the dynamics.

Encouraging open communication, fostering supportive relationships, and challenging stereotypes around emotional expression and relationships are vital steps in promoting men’s mental well-being and reducing feelings of isolation and loneliness. Breaking this silence  is imperative.

If you suspect that a loved one, colleague or friend is experiencing difficulties, consider the following practical steps to addressing matters:-

1. Look Out For Symptoms

We all cope with stressful situations in different ways.  Recognising how the men in your life cope is important to ascertain the status of their mental health.  Signs of mental health stressors can be exhibited in a variety of ways, be that physical, psychological and behavioural. Examples include:-

• problems sleeping, sleeping too much and extreme fatigue
• feelings of sadness and despair
• being nervous, restless, irritable, and having panic attacks
• digestive issues, headaches/migraines
• lack of appetite/overeating
• social withdrawal or isolation, i.e. refraining from social/sporting activities
• lack of interest in personal appearance
• not enjoying usual activities

2. Open Up a Dialogue - Start the Conversation

This is an important and necessary step to address behaviours which are causing concern.  Whilst the initial conversation may not be productive, it is important to provide reassurance and support to encourage any future dialogue.

Create a safe space to have important mental health conversations – we can support men by encouraging them to speak up about how they are really feeling.  Showing you care about these things allows men struggling with their thoughts and feelings to feel safe and heard. Whilst it may be difficult for men to admit that they are dealing with challenging thoughts and feelings, we can help those we care about find the space to open up and share their authentic feelings.

Conversations should focus on building up hope and highlighting strengths. Conversation topics can cover resilience, capabilities, and inherent worth. We should maintain a dialogue even when their mental health is in a good place, maintaining a safe space for them to open up and speak about their feelings before negative feelings take hold.

Take the lead from the media. If there is a programme or advert on TV use it to start a conversation. If you are reading an article such as this, share it with the men in your lives and ask for their thoughts. Do the same with your male work colleagues. You will be surprised at how open some will be about mental health.

3. Share Your Own Mental Health Journey

Sharing details of one’s own mental health challenges can demonstrate to others that they are not alone.  It can also provide an opportunity to forge a connection of shared experiences and to discuss coping mechanisms or strategies which may have proved successful on one’s own journey. 

Such conversations can prove impactful and may well provide the inspiration needed to consider changes necessary in their own mental health journey or help them become more aware of their moods and emotions. Talking about mental health issues helps to normalise it.  Sharing experiences is key to better mental health for everybody. 

4. Obtain Help and Encouragement From The Right Sources

Some men may struggle to take the initial steps to seek help, such as booking an appointment with a medical practitioner or mental health specialist, whether out of embarrassment, fear, or the stigma attached to mental health. You could ask if they would like you to make an appointment with the doctor and go with them but try not to put anyone under any pressure - if they don’t want to talk yet don’t force the issue. If nothing else, at least the seed of this idea has been planted.

A loved one may respond better to hearing from a specific source such as a male friend or parental figure or look for personal accounts of those encountering mental health challenges from a similar background or professional circle or a male celebrity, many of whom have been particularly vocal about their own challenges.

Consider modern technology such as podcasts, audio books, YouTube and apps, and discuss afterwards to learn what helps and what doesn’t. Consider joining the journey together.

Working with them to research resources and services can be beneficial. By securing medical appointments, researching support groups or therapy/peer groups, you show that you care and support them on their journey.  This also helps to reduce the stigma that surrounds mental health concerns, aiding early identification and clarification of behavioural concerns.

Provide the necessary support and space as and when needed.  It is important to remind them that you respect their privacy and their “safe space” where they may wish to process their thoughts and exercises in line with any professional medical and therapeutic support.

5. Support Healthy Lifestyle Choices

Healthy lifestyle choices can contribute to improved mental health – what we eat, how we sleep, and how much exercise we take can all play an important part in determining the state of our mental health.

Encourage a healthy work/life balance by setting appropriate boundaries to differentiate between home time and working hours, a healthy balance to support one’s wellbeing is enabled. Support healthy eating habits – a diet rich in protein, fresh fruit and vegetables will help to nourish the body with vitamins and minerals and support the brain. What we eat and drink will affect brain function and impact mood and mental health.

6. Spend Quality Time with The Men in Your Life

Doing things you both enjoy and spending quality time with the men in your life can promote good mental health.

Finding something you both enjoy doing can help boost mood and may encourage men to open up about their concerns.  We want those we care about to live happy, healthy, and fulfilling lives and spending time together is one way we can support them in achieving their goals.

Women can play an important part in supporting men in their mental health journey by reminding them that we are there for them, ready to listen and talk when needed, so that they can enjoy a happy and healthy life. Practice what you say. Listen if they open up and take care not to be defensive or critical. Remember gratitude and appreciate the things they do. This will all build to creating a safer space for them to speak up when ready.

A problem shared is a problem halved. There is strength in showing one’s vulnerable side - the realisation that the strongest men are those who take care of their mental and emotional health.

Please remember that you are not alone in this journey.

Wellbeing in the workplace Accreditation scheme

The Chair of our Committee, Juan Moore, has recently launched a wellbeing accreditation scheme for IOM Organisations via his consultancy company, Resolute Consultancy Limited. Juan is keen to see that wellbeing is addressed by all IOM organisations and being a governance professional has designed the scheme around the principals of good governance.

The Island is currently experiencing a crisis in relation to mental health where unfortunately all too many people cannot access the help they need. Whilst wellbeing is ultimately the responsibility of the individual it is widely recognised that the workplace can do more for their staff.

Deloitte’s identified the following in their Mental Health Report 2022:

• Mental ill health costs UK employers approximately £56 billion each year.
• Annual cost of presenteeism: approx. £28 billion
• Annual cost of staff turnover: approx. £22 billion
• Annual cost of absenteeism: approx. £6 billion
• The total annual cost of mental ill health to employers has increased by 25% since 2019.
• For every £1 spent by employers on mental health interventions, they get back £5.30 in reduced absence, presenteeism, and staff turnover.

The Isle of Man:

There are few statistics available for the Island, but the Isle of Man 2015 Mental Health Strategy identified the annual cost of mental ill health to be £167,405,000 and the work related cost being £47,830,000 (note these figures are nine years out of date). The Isle of Man government has stated that 1 in 4 people will suffer some form of mental illness, such as depression or anxiety, during their lifetime.

The accreditation scheme will assist those undertaking wellbeing to design and implement a sustainable and effective strategy, and will serve as a benchmark for all organisations.

You can find further details of the scheme here.

ManxPACT

Separately Juan has established a support group for people suffering with mental health difficulties called ManxPACT, People Actioning Change Together. You can find a directory on the site of help/businesses in the wellbeing sector. There is also a Facebook Group, with regular articles posted. This group is free for all and can be used by anyone. It is not a charity and does not accept any donations.

The Chartered Secretaries’ Charitable Trust aims to support Chartered Governance Institute UK & Ireland members, students who have been registered for at least two years, and dependants of members/ex-members through life’s challenges by providing appropriate financial relief and assistance. Our Charities Officer and Assistant correspond with you to aid in the application form process, and then anonymise your case to be shared with the Trust’s Support and Grants Committee who determine whether support can be offered, and how best this assistance can be provided.

Support can be offered in the form of membership subscriptions, TV License or communications allowance, quarterly payments to assist with the cost of living, and one-off grants for a wide variety of needs. If you qualify in the eligible criteria and would like to enquire about potential support, please contact our team.

Volunteer visitors are the cornerstone of the fund, and a great debt of gratitude is owed to them. Financial support may be all that is requested, but visitors can signpost other sources of help, assist in completing forms. and provide a friendly face to listen empathetically. There is no typical applicant, or one size fits all solution to applicant’s issues, but we have witnessed that the opportunity to talk to someone can be as vital as the financial aid the Trust provides regardless of age and situation.

If you think you could commit from time to time to visit and maintain telephone contact with an individual in need of support, we recommend you consider becoming a visitor. As well as making a vital contribution to the work of the trust, it is a rewarding and interesting activity. Training is available and travel expenses for visits are re-imbursed. If you are interested, please get in contact for an informal discussion without commitment.

Wellbeing Committee members:
Juan Moore (Chair), Emily Lightfoot, David Griffin, Marcelene Macullinane.

Contact: juan.moore@manx.net

The committee would welcome ideas for the newsletter or CPD events. New members to the Committee are welcome. Please contact Juan for details of work the Committee undertakes.